Monday, February 23, 2009

Having fun with the help center reps

Today I had a "Live Chat" online with my bank about an auto loan with a loan agent who was all but unreachable. Slightly frustrated that my issue was diverted to a cross-sell for a product I essentially already use, I decided to take a different, to the conversation.

I would also like to point out that, while I understand why scripts are necessary, I really hate them being read to me--especially via text chat. It feels like I'm talking to a robot.

Personally identifiable information (other than my name, since you already know what it is) has been changed.

Duration (actual chatting time) 00:14:11
Operator Gertrude

Chat Transcript
info: Please wait for a representative to respond.
info: Hello. My name is Gertrude. Have you financed a vehicle with Rich Uncle Pennybags in the past 18 months? In the event your vehicle was stolen or totaled in an accident, have you considered how you would pay off your loan and/or come up with a down payment on a replacement vehicle? Rich Uncle Pennybags has a low cost solution that will assist you in these situations. Would you like to hear about it?
info: Your confirmation number for this chat is 123ZOINKSLIKEHEYSCOOB4
Gertrude: Hello Michael, how may I assist you today?
Michael Paul: Hi Gertrude, I just recently got approved for an auto loan and want to know if I can just walk in to a Rich Uncle Pennybags branch to finish the paperwork, or if I still have to deal with "KT", the person assigned to my loan, over the phone.
Michael Paul: KT seems to be unavailable whenever I call.
Gertrude: I will be happy to assist you with this today. In the meantime, have there been any changes to your mailing address, telephone number, or e-mail address?
Michael Paul: no
Gertrude: Thank you for your patience. You will not be able to walk into a branch and sign paper work. Once you and K.T. are able to talk he can set up an appointment with you to visit a branch. While I have you online, I may have a way for you to monitor your account easier. Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?
Michael Paul: sure, go ahead.
Gertrude: How often do you use Rich Uncle Pennybags' online banking?
Michael Paul: every day
Gertrude: Great! Based on the fact that you use Rich Uncle Pennybags' online banking often I would recommend Finance Works. We are proud to offer Finance Works, a free personal money management tool. This great software is offered by Intuit, the same company that offers Quicken. Rich Uncle Pennybags is the second financial institution in the nation to offer this valuable money management tool. Finance Works will save you time because you can track, organize, and itemize all of your expenses. You can integrate your other Rich Uncle Pennybags accounts, as well as accounts you hold with other financial institutions. With this convenience, you can manage your expenses in one online banking session!
Gertrude: Would you like me to walk you through setting up Finance Works?
Michael Paul: No thanks, I already use Quicken connected to Rich Uncle Pennybags, but i might look into it in the future
Gertrude: Great! Is there anything else I can assist you with today Michael?
Michael Paul: Yeah, I'd like to assign my loan to someone else, because I'm having no luck with K.T. The guy seems impossible to reach unless you have the secret Bat Phone number.
Michael Paul: :-)
Gertrude: I have his direct phone number, would you like me to provide you with this number?
Michael Paul: No, because I have that direct phone number, too.
Michael Paul: ...unless you have the direct number to his Bat Phone ;)
Gertrude: I will be happy to see if I can get another loan officer to contact you.
Michael Paul: That would be outstanding, I really appreciate it.
Gertrude: May I get your best contact number?
Michael Paul: cell phone: 269-867-5309
Gertrude: Great! I will try to have someone contact you soon. Is there anything else I can assist you with today Michael?
Michael Paul: No, you've been great Gertrude! Thanks so much for having someone else contact me.
Gertrude: Thank you for choosing Rich Uncle Pennybags. If you need any assistance, please contact us at (800) 867-5309, or Live Chat at! We appreciate your business! Have a wonderful day!
Michael Paul: You too :-)